Dear Future Me – Part XIII

To anyone that is new – this is a series of letters written to myself, from myself, addressed to the future me.

It was a random trend I started back in 2016 and somehow managed to continue over the years.

If you’d like to read the previous entries, you’ll find them here – Dear Future Me

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Dear Future Me,

I daresay this entry might be the most important entry yet

After 3 months of marriage, and almost half a year of crazy schedules, I think we’ve finally settled into some sort of rhythm

If my earlier selves were here, I would picture them with ears open, eyes peeled, trying to make sure they don’t miss a second of what I say.

They’d want to know if I struggled, if what people say of marriage is true.

If it’s such a difficult compromise, a thankless job, an uphill battle.

It is not.

It is the most beautiful thing to possess – someone’s heart.

It’s not earth shattering and fireworks inducing.

No

It’s the fond look just before you fall asleep at night

It’s hugs in the middle of the kitchen after a meal

It’s the sleepy I Love You mumbled from between tired lips

It’s a tired sigh as fingers run through hair

It’s a quiet – Go sleep, when you can’t keep your eyes open.

It’s the tiny – Do you want coffee?, when you’re frustrated

It’s the million little things, it’s knowing the highs are going to be higher and the lows are going to be less low.

It’s two sets of parents who love you.

And it heals, all those unseen wounds you covered up

Don’t ever forget the tears swimming in your eyes as Yashasvi and Sahil gifted you champagne flutes with your names on it.

They wouldn’t know of the ones you had left behind in France because they’d break in transit during the flight.

Don’t forget the way he grabbed four bags so you’d only have to take two.

You lugged four bags alone down the staircases of the Paris metro, the bruises stayed for days.

It’s the food Aunty sent with you so you could reach Buffalo and eat your meals.

You had had to make do with a single croissant when you didn’t have the energy

It’s the pretty orchids that Raksh and Nikita brought over

You only ever had space for a little lucky bamboo plant before

This letter is so long, and I can’t think of an appropriate end for it, because it’s endless, isn’t it?

That’s what marriage is like – a gift that keeps giving

So go watch that sunset by the Canalside

Go dance to Backstreet Boys at Riverworks

Go repurpose everything in the Bath aisle at Marshalls

Go enjoy those little things

In the end, those are what matter

Remember the wedding itself – unequivocally the best day of your life

Remember everyone that helped make it a success, even with the insane time crunch

From the bridesmaids to Ashu and Nick, from Mom and Dad to Tata and Tatima and Mashu – you owe them a great deal

And to Sneha, the little girl that grew up before you, running around in hideous shoes under a beautiful dress to make sure every single little thing went according to plan. To make sure you only enjoyed the day, that nothing made you sad, even as she tried to discreetly wipe away those tears.

Never forget that.

Now go, live your happy life!

Love,

Sonali

04/18/2024